全国高考英语满分作文赏析12948

全国高考英语满分作文赏析12948

一. 用词准确;表达地道 ‎　【北京卷】　　【试题回放】　　第一节情景作文(20分)‎ ‎　　美国中学生jeff将要来你所在的红星中学学习中文，经协商安排住在你家。假设你是李华，请给Jeff写一封信，按照下图顺序介绍他来中国后的生活安排。‎ ‎　　注意：1. 信的开头已为你写好。　　2.词数不少于60。‎ ‎　　Dear Jeff,‎ ‎　　I’m Hua from Beijing‎ Hongxing ‎Middle School. I’m very happy to learn that you’re going to stay with my family while you’re in Beijing.‎ ‎　　While you are here, we’ll provide you with a room of your own with a bed, a desk, a couple of chairs and a TV. You’ll also have your own bathroom. Our school is quite close to our home, so we could go to school together by bike. At noon we’ll eat at the school dining hall. I’m sure you’ll like the delicious Chinese food there, and enjoy talking with friends over lunch. Classes in our school usually finish at ‎4 in the afternoon. You can then join other students in playing ball games or swimming. It’ll be a lot of fun.‎ ‎　　If you have any questions or requests, please let me know. We’ll try our best to make your stay here in Beijing a pleasant experience.‎ ‎　　Best wishes,‎ ‎　　Li Hua ‎　　[名师点评]‎ ‎　　这篇文章的特点还是比较清晰的，第一，作者根据图画将文章的要点概括完整，内容充实而丰富，结构紧凑，有层次感;第二，本文没有采用华丽的辞藻，但用词十分恰当，段落过渡自然，令人耳目一新。 ‎ ‎ 【安徽卷】【试题回放】‎ ‎　　假如你是李华，美国一所友好学校准备与你们学校共同创办一份中学生英文刊物，该校格林先生来信询问有关情况。请你给她写封回信，假如你是李华，美国一所友好学校准备与你们学校共同创办一份中学生英文刊物，该校格林先生来信询问有关情况。请你给她写封回信，主要内容如下：‎ ‎　　l 表示赞成。 　　l 提出你喜欢的栏目。 　　l 简要说明理由。‎ ‎　　注意：　　1. 词数100左右。　　 2. 新的开头和结尾已为你写好。　　‎ ‎ 3. 适当增加细节，以使行文连贯。　　4. 参考栏目：栏目—column ‎　　Dear Mr. Green,‎ ‎　　I am very excited to learn that we are going to start a magazine together. That sounds great! And I definitely agree with you on that.‎ ‎　　Some of the columns which you mentioned in the letter are really my cup of tea. Say, “culture express” gives us a better understanding of the world. Since people from different parts of the world have different values, it’s necessary to learn from each other. This will offer a wonderful chance. Apart from that, “blurt out” is pretty good for Chinese students to learn English idioms and improve oral English. Last but not least, “entertainment” is so cool! The popular singers, actors and celebrities are so catchy and attractive that you absolutely can’t miss it! Teenagers are just fond of the trendy things.‎ ‎　　Well, I can’t list more. I really can’t wait to read that magazine!‎ ‎　　Yours faithfully,‎ ‎　　Li Hua ‎　　【名师点评】‎ ‎　　这是一篇满分作文。由于这篇作文的出现，导致了安徽省该年的英语作文分数普遍偏低。仔细分析了这篇文章，写的的确是好，很地道的美式英语，一些词语的大胆使用，让人不得不猜测此人或者是家人可能有过国外生活的经历，否则这么地道标准的英语，可不是一朝一夕所能写出来的。比如说：my cup of tea, apart from that, oral English, last but not least, celebrities, catchy和trendy的大胆运用，list, can't wait to 简直是perfect! 况且文章中没有一个错误，不管是书写还是语法。英语能够学到这种程度，不可谓不让人佩服。‎ 二. 非谓语动词为作文添彩 ‎ 【北京卷】　　【试题回放】情景作文 ‎　　假设你是红星中学高三一班的学生李华，为响应绿化祖国的号召，你班四月十二日去郊区植树，请根据以下四幅图的先后顺序，介绍植树活动的全过程，给某英文杂志的“绿色行动”专栏写一篇以“Green Action in Our Class”为题的英文稿件。‎ ‎　　注意：词数不少于60 　　提示词：郊区 suburbs ‎　　April 12 is memorable because our class had a meaningful experience on that day. In the morning, we bicycled to the suburbs to plant trees, talking and laughing all the way. Upon arrival, we began to work immediately. Some were digging holes. Some were carrying and planting young trees. Others were watering . After getting the work done, we put up a board reminding people to protect the trees. Before leaving we took some photos to record our green action. Seeing the lines of trees, we all had a sense of achievement. We feel it’s our duty to protect and beautify our environment.‎ ‎　　【名师点评】‎ ‎　　本文是设计巧妙的提纲要点式作文，与环保结合，立意较好。文章思路清晰，要点连贯，在语言的表达上选词新颖，同时运用了分词短语作状语等较好的句式表达。‎ ‎　　‎ ‎ 【北京卷】　　【试题回放】开放作文 ‎　　请根据下面提示，写一篇短文，词数不少于50‎ ‎　　In your spoken English class, your teacher shows you the following picture. You are asked to describe the picture and explain how you understand it.‎ ‎　　What an interesting picture! A western young man, sitting at a table, is ready to eat a bowl of noodles. He is holding two forks the same way as we Chinese hold chopsticks. He is trying so hard to pick up the noodles that he is sweating a lot. At first glance, I think it’s a bit funny, for we Chinese take for granted that chopsticks are the tools for eating noodles. The man in the picture is trying to copy us. Obviously he is doing it the hard way. Maybe using one fork will do a better job, In my opinion, we don’t need to copy others’ ways of thinking. Sometimes a simpler way of doing things may be a better way.‎ ‎　　【名师点评】‎ ‎　　本文是开放性作文，要求考生把握好图画内容，发散表达。考生重点要看出这个人是卷发高鼻的外国人，要体会到西式刀叉对中式食物的矛盾性。行文结构十分明晰，同时句式使用得熟练而准确。‎ 三. 复合句为写作增色 ‎ 【全国卷】　　【试题回放】‎ ‎ 假定你是李华，从小喜爱大熊猫(panda),一直通过有关网站(website)关注三年前在美国圣迭哥动物园出生的大熊猫“苏琳”和她的母亲“白云”。现在苏琳即将三岁。请根据以下要点给动物园工作人员写一封信：‎ ‎　　1、 自我介绍;2、 祝贺苏琳生日;3、 感谢工作人员;4、 索取苏琳三岁生日照。‎ ‎　　注意：1、词数100左右;2、可以适当增加细节，以使行文连贯;3、开头语已为你写好。‎ ‎　　例文：‎ ‎　　Dear Sir/Madam,‎ ‎　　Greetings from China!‎ ‎　　I’m Li Hua, a student in Sichuan. I’ve been a panda lover since I was a child. About three years ago I was delighted to learn that Baiyun gave birth to her daughter Sulin and I’ve been watching her grow on your website,. Now she’s going to be three. I’d like to wish her a happy birthday and to express my thanks to you for your hard work, because of which Sulin and her parents are living a happy and healthy life in the US.‎ ‎　　By the way, could I have a photo of Sulin taken on her third birthday? Thank you very much in advance.‎ ‎　　Yours truly,‎ ‎　　Li Hua ‎　　【名师点评】本文写作的内容要点如下：‎ ‎　　1.自我介绍;2.信息来源;3.祝贺生日;4.感谢照顾;5.索取照片;6.合适的结尾。‎ ‎　　这封信格式正确，行文规范，描述有条不紊，称呼、正文中的开头及结尾、结束语均表达到位。文章行文活泼，感情真挚，语言表述准确，洋溢着作者因大熊猫得到精心照顾而对美方人员的感激之情，以及希望自己愿望成真，得到照片的希冀之情。长短句运用合理，结合了简单句和复合句，流畅自然，不露痕迹，的确是一篇佳作。‎ ‎　　‎ ‎ 积累卡片英汉互译 ‎　　好词1.delighted adj.欣喜的，快乐的 2.express v.表达 3.give birth to v.产生，生育 ‎　　好句I’d like to wish her a happy birthday and to express my thanks to you for your hard work, because of which Sulin and her parents are living a happy and healthy life in the US.‎ ‎　　我祝福它生日快乐并且对你们的辛勤工作表达我的感激之情，正是你们的努力工作让苏琳和它的父母在美国过着幸福和健康的生活。‎ ‎　　【全国卷II】【试题回放】‎ ‎　　一家宾馆新开业，为吸引外国宾客，希望在互联网上进行宣传。请你用英语为其 写一篇文字介绍。主要内容包括：‎ ‎　　1.地点：距白山入口处‎500米;‎ ‎　　2.房间及价格：单人间(共20间)，100元/天;双人间(共15间)，150元/天;热水淋浴;3.餐饮：餐厅(中、西餐)，咖啡厅(茶、咖啡);4.游泳池：全天免费开放; 5.欢迎预定。‎ ‎　　注意：1.词数100左右，开头语已为你写好;2.可适当增加细节，以使行文连贯。‎ ‎　　Welcome to Baishan Mountain Hotel!‎ ‎　　Baishan Mountain Hotel is now open for business.‎ ‎　　500 meters far from the entrance of Baishan Mountain, it provides singleperson room, of which the price is RMB100 yuan per day and the number is 20, and 15 double person rooms, with a price of RMB 150 yuan per day. It also provides hot water bath service. You can enjoy both Chinese and western food in the restaurant and drink coffee and tea in the cafe. The swimming pool is open for free the whole day. All these services can bring great convenience to you and are very enjoyable. So come to enjoy yourself!‎ ‎　　Welcome to book rooms in Baishan‎ ‎Mountain.‎ ‎　　【名师点评】‎ ‎　　本文开门见山，首先点明了主旨。本文最大的特点是应用了很多比较复杂的句式，使文章比较出彩。开头使用了独立结构交代宾馆位置。which引导的非限制性定语从句的使用也很正确。总地来说，文章句式精炼，是篇不错的满分作文。‎ ‎　　积累卡片英汉互译 ‎　　好词　1. provide v.提供2. convenience n.便利 ‎　　好句All these services can bring great convenience to you and are ‎　　very enjoyable.所有这些服务都会给你带来便利，并且非常的愉快。‎ 评析：bring great convenience，带来便利。‎ ‎　　‎ ‎【重庆卷】　　【试题回放】‎ ‎　　据报道，7岁的美国女孩Amy Bruce得知自己身患肺癌(lung cancer)后处于极度的痛苦之中，美国抗癌协会(ACS)决定，每当Amy收到一封慰问信，就给她增加3美分的治疗款。‎ ‎　　假如你是新华中学的学生李华，请你用英文给Amy写一封慰问信，主要内容包括：‎ ‎　　自我介绍 ‎　　得知的情况 ‎　　表示鼓励 ‎　　打算为她做什么 ‎　　祝她早日康复 ‎　　注意：‎ ‎　　1. 信的格式已为你写好 ‎　　2. 信中不得出现你的真实情况。‎ ‎　　3. 词数100左右。‎ ‎　　4. 请在答题卡上作答。‎ ‎　　Dear Amy,‎ ‎　　I’m Li Hua from Xinhua Middle School of China. I’m sorry to hear that you got the lung cancer which brought you great pain. But you should realize that you are young and have a promising great future. So, stand up and fight against the disease! I’m sure you will win. It is reported that the America anti-cancer association will donate three cents upon every comfort letter you receive. So I will tell your situation to all my friends and ask them to write to you. In that way, you will get enough money for you to be cured. Hope you can be well soon.‎ ‎　　Yours,‎ ‎　　Li Hua ‎　　[名师点评]‎ ‎　　本文依照要求，涵盖了所有要点。文章使用了高中常见的句式，如I’m sorry to hear that..., It is reported that...等，都比较好。作者对定语从句的使用恰到好处地修饰了文章，行文自然而通顺，值得学习。‎ ‎　　积累卡片 ‎　　好词1.realize v.意识到2.promise v.允诺3.donate v.捐赠 ‎　　好句1. Im sorry to hear that you got the lung cancer which brings you great pain.‎ ‎　　我很遗憾地得知你身患肺癌，给你带来了巨大的痛苦。‎ ‎　　好处：which引导限制性定语从句。‎ ‎　　2. So, stand up and fight against the disease!‎ ‎　　因此，坚强地与疾病做斗争吧!‎ ‎　　好处：掷地有声，语言准确。 ‎ 四. 结构清晰,句式准确 ‎【江苏卷】　　【试题回放】‎ ‎2007年4月29日上午10点到11点，全国亿万学生阳光体育活动在各地大中小学校同时进行，江苏省1，100万学生积极参与了这项活动。‎ ‎　　教育部倡导学生：‎ ‎　　u 每天锻炼一小时 ‎　　u 健康工作五十年 ‎　　u 幸福生活一辈子 ‎　　请你根据以上提示，用英语准备一份发言稿，向同学们讲述一下阳光体育活动的有关情况，并就高三学生是否需要每天花一小时锻炼，谈谈你的看法及理由。‎ ‎　　注意：‎ ‎　　1、 发言稿应包括以上所有信息，要有适当发挥。‎ ‎　　2、 词数：120左右。发言稿的开头和结尾已经写好，不计入总词数。‎ ‎　　3、 参考词汇：阳光体育活动——a national student sports program;‎ ‎　　教育部——the Ministry of Education ‎　　Good afternoon, everyone,‎ ‎　　The national student sports program, waged by the Ministry of Education and aimed at improving students health, was held from 10：‎00a.m.~11:‎00a.m.on April 29，‎2007 in many primary and middle schools all over China. Almost 11 million students in Jiangsu province participated in this program.‎ ‎　　The Ministry of Education advocates that we do exercises for one hour a day and can work healthily for 50 years. Our whole life will be very enjoyable.‎ ‎　　In my opinion, we senior high school students should do exercises for one hour a day even though our spare time is limited. Health is a basic condition for our study. If we did not do exercises, we wouldn’t be able to get good study records. So every one of you, join the program now!‎ ‎　　Thank you!‎ ‎　　【名师点评】‎ ‎　　本文的结构十分明晰，同时句式使用得熟练而准确。本文分为三段，前两段叙述，后一段发表观点，典型的作文结构。在句式使用上，作者用法多样，使用了独立结构和虚拟语气，十分出彩。复杂的句式是本文的特点之一。‎ ‎　　积累卡片 ‎　　好词1.wage v.发动2.aim v.瞄准3. advocate v.提倡 ‎　　好句1. The Ministry of Education advocates that we do exercises for one hour a day and can work healthily for 50 years.‎ ‎　　教育部提倡我们每天做一个小时的运动，能够健康地活50年。‎ ‎　　评析：advocate，其后接虚拟语气，可以省略情态动词。‎ ‎　　好句2. If we did not do exercises, we wouldn’t be able to get good study records.‎ ‎　　如果我们不进行运动，我们的学习成绩就不会很好。‎ ‎　　评析：虚拟语气。‎ ‎　　‎